Stakeholder Management for Product Managers: The No BS Guide

Why Thriving as a PM Means Putting Stakeholders First (Even If You Hate It)

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One of the most dreaded parts of being a PM is the drudgery of managing multiple stakeholders. The word itself can make a straightforward PM shiver. Any PM working in a corporate environment can tell you that this eats up almost 60% of their time, juggling expectations at multiple levels. But the reality is that it is essential to accept it to succeed as a PM.

A lot of PMs hate it and try to push back, but that usually leads to their downfall. You, as the PM, may be busy doing “good” work—running experiments, adding crucial stability features, building for the future. However, if you don’t communicate this to the broader team, your stakeholders will feel ignored, even cheated. In larger companies, success is less about what you’re doing and more about making sure everyone knows what you’re doing. And I mean everyone—your immediate team, their managers, and the folks above them, all the way up.

Here’s the mindset I’ve developed to not just survive, but thrive in stakeholder management:

Stakeholders Are Your First Customers

Let me put it plainly: without stakeholder buy-in, your features won’t reach actual customers. Many PMs mistakenly think managing stakeholders is a side effect of the PM role, but it’s not. It’s *the* role - You need them to move ahead. Different people are invested in the project you’re running—your Engineering Manager (EM) needs to justify their resource investment, your boss needs to prove they need you, the Design Manager wants to showcase work for promotions, and the Execs need results to secure funding. So, if you just release a feature and stay quiet, you’ve made it impossible for these folks to justify their existence, and hence, be your loyal customers going forward. Your job is to make them relevant—and in doing so, you’ll keep yourself relevant too.

Decisions Won’t Always Go Your Way. Deal With It.

Corporate decision-making isn’t all sunshine and teamwork. Often, it’s based on the HIPPO method—the “highest-paid person’s opinion.” If you’re a junior or mid-level PM, you likely aren’t that person. You’ll have discussions, your opinions will be “heard,” but when it comes down to it, the decision may not align with your vision. So, do your job: share your opinion in a structured, data-backed way, and then let it go. If a decision goes against you, don’t sulk. Instead, throw yourself into making it work. Define a lean MVP that uses fewer resources but still gets results. That kind of grit and adaptability gets noticed.

Help Your Stakeholders Shine, and They’ll Do the Same for You

Everyone wants to feel validated—junior team members want visibility, peers want recognition, and senior leaders want their decisions to be proven right. For juniors, give them good work, appreciate them publicly, and provide visibility whenever you can. With peers, make sure they feel included; talk up their contributions, co-present with them in exec reviews, and be an ally. When someone in their team messes up, don’t escalate—help them fix it, as you would for your own team. For seniors, validate their decisions by following through. They’ll remember your loyalty and support when you need it most.

Make Allies, Not Friends

Allies will go to war with you; friends might not. As a PM, your top allies should be your EM and Design Manager. Argue behind closed doors if you need to, but when you’re in front of stakeholders, you’re a solid front. It’s common to not always get along personally, but remember—it’s about trust, not friendship. Executives take note of a team that appears unified, and this consistency can build trust even more than delivering results.

It’s Just Business, Not Personal

For a long time, I took everything personally. If a feature flopped, I blamed myself. If a strategic decision backfired, I thought I hadn’t done enough. But in big companies, there’s a lot beyond any one person’s control. The PM is often an influencer, not the decision-maker. If things go sideways, it’s rarely on your shoulders alone. All you can do is put your best foot forward, make a clear, rational case, and be prepared to let it go if things don’t go your way. If it fails, it’s a learning, not a personal failure.

The Bottom Line

Stakeholder management is a grind, but it’s also your best opportunity for growth as a PM. Remember: stakeholders are your first customers, decisions won’t always go your way, and allies are far more valuable than friends. Get this mindset right, and you’ll not only be a better PM—you’ll be someone people trust and respect in the long run.